See, who's Talking!

July 19

Funny One-liners from Kids: Part 2

What do you call a Penguin in the desert?
Lost
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No idear
What do snowmen have for breakfast?
Snowflakes
What do you call cheese that's not your cheese?
Nacho cheese!
What do you call a country, where all the cars in it are pink?
A pink carnation.
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhino?
Elifino! (Hell if I know)
What's the difference between a a love story reader and a farmer?
One reads it and weeps, the other weeds it and reaps.
What goes up and down but never moves?
Stairs.
What building has the most stories?
The library.
What mostly don't you hear in school?
The H.

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July 12

Funny One-Liners from Kids: Part 1

If Johns mom has 5 sons and their names are Ja, Je, Ji, and Jo.
Who is the last one?
John.
What kind of flower do you have between your nose and your chin?
Tulips.
What is the best way to keep food bills down?
Use a paperweight!
What tools do you need in math class?
Multi-Pliers
What did Billy say after he learned how to count money?
"It all makes cents now!"
What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back to you?
A stick
(They're all sticks to me!)
What did the the tie say to the hat?
You go on a head, I'll just hang around.
What Question must you always answer yes to?
What does Y-E-S spell?
What do you call a bear without an ear?
B
What do you call a rabbit with fleas?
Bugs Bunny

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What is Your Favourite Colour?

What does your favourite colour say about you? Your preference of one colour over the other can easily express your personality and character traits.

Go ahead, find out about your colour!!

Red
If your natural choice is the colour red, you are the outgoing type. You not only act on impulse, but you are prone to abrupt mood swings. You have a lot of compassion for fellow human beings and can be easily persuaded. Though you have an optimistic approach to life, you don't hesitate to grumble and complain as well. Your spontaneous nature is assertive, you freely voice your opinions. You have a strong sex drive and are likely to end up having extra-marital affairs, unless your strong sense of duty restrains you from indulging in wild fantasies.

Orange
The choice of this colour shows that you are basically good-natured and loyal. You are sociable but at the same time you tend to be swayed by the opinions of other people. You are a generous soul, sincere at heart. Your gestures are friendly, and inspired by goodwill. More often than not, you are overtaken by feelings of wanton elation.

Yellow
If you have preference for yellow, it shows that you have a vivid imagination and lots of nervous energy. Your thoughts are clear and well organised. You do harbour a need to help the world, but you won't get the dirt under your fingernails doing that. Deep down you are a shy person and a loner; perhaps that's what makes you a reliable friend. You may not show it, but you would actually love to be respected and admired for your prudence.

Green
Preference for the colour green shows that you are a dutiful citizen. You are not only aware but also sensitive to social customs, and bear a good name in your community. Your choice also indicates your honesty and straightforwardness. You have a normal sex drive and are very emotionally attached to your family. You have the potential to be an excellent teacher.

Blue
If your personal colour is blue, you are introspective and purposeful by nature. You hold conservative beliefs and under stressful conditions, prefer to withdraw into gentler surroundings. You seem to have a lot of control over your passions and desires, but are sensitive to the needs and feelings of others, nonetheless. You are a loyal friend and would prefer to lead a sober life.

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April 30

Change Your Perspective

[photo by fdecomite]

Most of us can afford to take a lesson from the oyster. The most
extraordinary thing about the oyster is this: Irritations get into his shell.
He does not like them; he tries to get rid of them.

But when he cannot get rid of them, he settles down to make of them one of the most
beautiful things in the world. He uses the irritation to do the loveliest
thing that an oyster ever has a chance to do.

If there are irritations in your lives today, there is only one prescription:
Make a pearl.

It may have to be a pearl of patience, but anyhow, make a pearl.

All it takes is love and faith to do it.

March 28

Happiness Follows

Once there was an old alley cat walking down the street looking for
his supper. As he walked along he came upon a beautiful young cat
who was running around in circles chasing her tail. Around and
around she went trying as hard as she could to catch her tail.

The old alley cat stopped and asked her, "What are you doing?" The young
cat slowed down and replied that she had been taught that joy,
happiness, success and luck were all in the tip of her tail. "All that I
have to do is catch the end of my tail, and I will have the happy life,
she said.

The old alley cat replied, "I've been around for a long time,
and I know that joy, happiness, success and luck are in the tip of my
tail; but, you know if I don't chase it and work my very hardest and
don't worry about it, the happy life follows me wherever I go. My tail
follows me everywhere, so I don't need to chase it."

Happiness isn't a place, a time, or a possession. You have to make it happen. The
ways to make it happen is to stop worrying about everything and just
go about your business, and do your very best. Then, if you really
work hard, your happiness will follow you just like the alley cat's tail.

March 27

The Star Thrower

The Star Thrower tells of a man, in his prime, who observes the shell
collectors at the beach in the height of tourist season, particularly
after a storm, engaged in a kind of greedy madness to out-collect his
less aggressive neighbours.

He watches them scrambling along the
beach at dawn with bundles of gathered starfish, hermit crabs, sea
urchins, and other living shells. Arguing, toppling over each other,
overburdened, they rush in a kind of frenzy to outdo each other for
these fine specimens.

The shell collectors then boil the shell
"houses," occupants included, in outdoor kettles provided by the
resort hotels as a service to guests who will show off their proud
collections to envious relatives and friends back home.

There are
many people with the collectors' morality. They are not unique to the
seashore. They are people who are trying to collect things in life in
search of happiness. They are the consumers who think you may
purchase happiness. The man noticed a solitary human figure
standing near the water's edge in the centre of a rainbow caused by
the sun-filled spray. The figure stooped over, then stood up to fling an
object out to sea beyond the breaking surf.

The spectator finally
reached the older figure and asked him what he was doing. The old
man with the bronzed, worn face answered softly, "I'm a star thrower."
Expecting to see a sand dollar or perhaps a flat rock -- like the ones
he used to skim across the water for fun -- the younger man came
closer for a better look.

The old man, with a quick yet gentle
movement, picked up another starfish and spun it gracefully far out
into the sea. "It may live," he said, "if the offshore pull is strong
enough." Here was a human being who was not a collector. He said
he had decided to be part of life and had dedicated himself to helping
give another day, another week, another year, and another
opportunity for living.

The younger man silently reached down and
skipped a still-living starfish across the water toward freedom. He felt
like a gardener sowing the seeds of life. He looked back over his
shoulder. Against the rainbow, the old Star Thrower stooped and
flung once more. He understood the secret. Life cannot be collected.

Happiness cannot be travelled to, owned, earned, worn, or
consumed. Happiness is the natural experience of living every minute
with love, grace, and gratitude. The gift of life is not a treasure hunt
like on the beach, you cannot look for success.

The treasure is not in what you own, what you wear, how you
look or your worldly accomplishments. The treasure is within
you. It only needs to be uncovered and discovered. The secret is
to turn a life of collection into the life of a Star Thrower.

March 12

Learning To Get Back Up

Bringing a giraffe into the world is a tall order. A baby giraffe falls 10
feet from its mother’s womb and usually lands on its back. Within
seconds it rolls over and tucks its legs under its body. From this
position it considers the world for the first time and shakes off the last
vestiges of the birthing fluid from its eyes and ears. Then the mother
giraffe rudely introduces its offspring to the reality of life.

In his book, A View from the Zoo, Gary Richmond describes how a
newborn giraffe learns its first lesson:-

The mother giraffe lowers her head long enough to take a quick look.
Then she positions herself directly over her calf. She waits for about a
minute, and then she does the most unreasonable thing. She swings
her long, pendulous leg outward and kicks her baby, so that it is sent
sprawling head over heels.

When it doesn’t get up, the violent process is repeated over and over
again. The struggle to rise is momentous. As the baby calf grows
tired, the mother kicks it again to stimulate its efforts. Finally, the calf
stands for the first time on its wobbly legs.

Then the mother giraffe does the most remarkable thing. She kicks is
off its feet again. Why? She wants it to remember how it got up. In the
wild, baby giraffes must be able to get up as quickly as possible to
stay with the herd, where there is safety. Lions, hyenas, leopards,
and wild hunting dogs all enjoy young giraffes, and they’d get it too, if
the mother didn’t teach her calf to get up quickly and get with it.

The late Irving Stone understood this. He spent a lifetime studying
greatness, writing novelized biographies of such men as
Michelangelo, Vincent van Gogh, Sigmund Freud, and Charles
Darwin.

Stone was once asked if he had found a thread that runs through the
lives of all these exceptional people. He said, “I write about people
who sometime in their life have a vision or dream of something that
should be accomplished and they go to work. They are beaten over
the head, knocked down, vilified, and for years they get nowhere.
But every time they’re knocked down they stand up. You cannot
destroy these people. And at the end of their lives they’ve
accomplished some modest part of what they set out to do.”

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February 18

In the Temple

In the Temple:

A religious scholar and a priest are standing in the largely empty temple one day, talking mystically about how, given the awesome glory of God's Infinite Divine Presence, they are each really "nothing." "Yes," says the religious scholar, "I am nothing!" The priest also affirms, looking up to the heavens, "O God, I am completely nothing!" And they go on like this for several rounds—"I am nothing… I am utterly nothing."

Meanwhile, the temple's cleaner is on his knees, scrubbing the floor. Filled with piety and a fervent spirit, he has all the while been repeating in a gentle voice, "O Lord, You are everything and I am nothing… I am nothing." The scholar and priest at one point listen in and, after a few moments, come to realize what he is saying.

At this, the scholar nudges the priest and smugly says, "Look who thinks he's nothing!"

Moral:

We want to feel that we are Nothing compared to God, but most of the time we are over taken by our EGO and consider ourselves as the Best Devotee. Having a attitude like that puts you to the end of the QUEUE.

One of the good things (Apart from Prasadam) I learnt from associating with the devotees is that they have always taught me (Rule of thumb) Do not consider yourself to be Krsna devotee... Try to consider urself as the devotee of a devotee of a devotee.

Thus making sure that pride does not overcome us and also we are dearer to GOD.

January 17

Ten Beautiful Quotes

1. It's The Little Things That Makes Living Worthwhile.
2. The toughest thing about success is that you have to keep on being a success.
3. Anyone can win unless there happens to be a second entry.
4. The task ahead of us is never as great as the power behind us.
5. Now or never was the time.
6. You won't win if you don't begin.
7. It is hard to fail, but it is worse to never to have tried to succeed.
8. Failure is not defeat, until you stop trying.
9. To dream of the person you'd like to be is to waste the person who you are.
10. Becoming number one is easier then remaining number one.

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December 28

Some of My Photos

December 12

The Emperor of Zen

Gudo was the emperor's teacher of his time. Nevertheless, he used to travel alone as a wandering mendicant. Once when he was on his was to Edo, the cultural and political center of the shogunate, he approached a little village named Takenaka. It was evening and a heavy rain was falling. Gudo was thoroughly wet. His straw sandals were in pieces. At a farmhouse near the village he noticed four or five pairs of sandals in the window and decided to buy some dry ones.

The woman who offered him the sandals, seeing how wet he was, invited him in to remain for the night at her home. Gudo accepted, thanking her. He entered and recited a sutra before the family shrine. He then was introduced to the woman's mother, and to her children. Observing that the entire family was depressed, Gudo asked what was wrong.

"My husband is a gambler and a drunkard," the housewife told him. "When he happens to win he drinks and becomes abusive. When he loses he borrows money from others. Sometimes when he becomes thoroughly drunk he does not come home at all. What can I do?"

I will help him," said Gudo. "Here is some money. Get me a gallon of fine wine and something good to eat. Then you may retire. I will meditate before the shrine."

When the man of the house returned about midnight, quite drunk, he bellowed: "Hey, wife, I am home. Have you something for me to eat?"

"I have something for you," said Gudo. "I happened to get caught in the rain and your wife kindly asked me to remain here for the night. In return I have bought some wine and fish, so you might as well have them."

The man was delighted. He drank the wine at once and laid himself down on the floor. Gudo sat in meditation beside him.

In the morning when the husband awoke he had forgotten about the previous night. "Who are you? Where do you come from?" he asked Gudo, who still was meditating.

"I am Gudo of Kyoto and I am going on to Edo," replied the Zen master.

The man was utterly ashamed. He apologized profusely to the teacher of his emperor.

Gudo smiled. "Everything in this life is impermanent," he explained. "Life is very brief. If you keep on gambling and drinking, you will have no time left to accomplish anything else, and you will cause your family to suffer too."

The perception of the husband awoke as if from a dream. "You are right," he declared. "How can I ever repay you for this wonderful teaching! Let me see you off and carry your things a little way."

"If you wish," assented Gudo.

The two started out. After they had gone three miles Gudo told him to return. "Just another five miles," he begged Gudo. They continued on.

"You may return now," suggested Gudo.

"After another ten miles," the man replied.

"Return now," said Gudo, when the ten miles had been passed.

"I am going to follow you all the rest of my life," declared the man.

Modern Zen teachers in Japan spring from the lineage of a famous master who was the successor of Gudo. His name was Mu-nan, the man who never turned back.

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November 13

Fun:Before and After Marriage

Before Marriage
Boy: Yes. At last. It was so hard to wait.
Girl: Do you want me to leave?
Boy: NO! Don't even think about it.
Girl: Do you love me?
Boy: Of course! Over and over!
Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
Boy: NO! Why are you even asking?
Girl: Will you kiss me?
Boy: Every chance I get!
Girl: Will you hit me?
Boy: Are you crazy! I'm not that kind of person!
Girl: Can I trust you?
Boy: Yes.
Girl: Darling!

After marriage - - - simply read from bottom to top

October 26

A vision helps, really!

The Catalina Island is twenty-one miles away from the coast of California,
and many people have taken the challenge to swim across it. On July 4th 1952,
Florence Chadwick stepped into the water off Catalina Island to swim across
to the California coast. She started well and on course, but later fatigue
set in, and the weather became cold. She persisted, but fifteen hours later,
numb and cold, she asked to be taken out of the water.

After she recovered, she was told that she had been pulled out only half a
mile away from the coast. She commented that she could have made it, if the
fog had not affected her vision and she would have just seen the land. She
promised that this would be the only time that she would ever quit.

She went back to her rigorous training. And two months later she swam that
same channel. The same thing happened. The fatigue set in, and the fog
obscured her view, but this time she swam with faith and vision of the land in her
mind. She knew that somewhere behind the fog was land. She succeeded and
became the first woman to swim the Catalina Channel. She even broke the men's
record by two hours. When you set your goal, keep pressing on even when you are tired, physically
and mentally, and even though there are many challenges ahead. Keep the
vision of your goal crystal clear before you and never, never, never give up!
See the reaching, commit to it, and you will surely see your goal realized.

Courtesy: a forwarded email

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October 21

The Story of an Ant

One morning I wasted nearly an hour watching a tiny ant carry a huge feather cross my back terrace. Several times it was confronted by obstacles in its path and after a momentary pause it would make the necessary detour.

At one point the ant had to negotiate a crack in the concrete about 10mm wide. After brief contemplation the ant laid the feather over the crack, walked across it and picked up the feather on the other side then continued on its way. I was fascinated by the ingenuity of this ant, one of God's smallest creatures. It served to reinforce the miracle of creation. Here was a minute insect, lacking in size yet equipped with a brain to reason, explore, discover and overcome. But this ant, like the two-legged co-residents of this planet, also share human failings.

After some time the ant finally reached its destination - a flower bed at the end of the terrace and a small hole that was the entrance to its underground home. And it was here that the ant finally met its match. How could that large feather possibly fit down small hole

Of course it couldn't. so the ant, after all this trouble and exercising great ingenuity, overcoming problems all along the way, just abandoned the feather and went home.

The ant had not thought the problem through before it began its epic journey and in the end the feather was nothing more than a burden. Isn't life like that!

We worry about our family, we worry about money or the lack of it, we worry about work, about where we live, about al

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